Building Strength through Repetition
Have you ever wondered how some people can seem to be so good at life? Have you ever been envious of the seeming ease with which people have successful marriages, great physique, or strong faith? Dive into this article to see how you can get better at all of these things with just a little regular practice.
Welcome to my world
It was October. This means many things to many people: sweater weather, fall colors and pumpkin spice flavoring in every type of food and drink imaginable. For me – it is a time to reignite my spiritual life bringing to mind my good habits forgotten by summer- which today meant attending a Morning Retreat for Busy Women. The sun was shining on this beautiful morning and I was not fully willing to let go of the summer. Even with a cooler temperature outside, I figured if my heat was on high, and my seat warmer on- I could still ride with my convertible top down. Trying to get my routine back, I blasted my radio with my podcast of morning prayers in Gospel reflection.
On the way to the retreat…
As my gospel reflection ended, I expected some time in silence. Immediately, I was surprised to hear another podcast which was probably automatically queued- reaching for the knob to turn it, the guy caught my attention…he was saying how much he disagrees with society claiming that everything today is an addiction. Having experienced addictions firsthand, my defenses began to prickle. Knowing this guy to be a catholic (albeit a very sarcastic one), I decided (being a bit sarcastic myself) to hear him out where he goes with this.
He pointed out, “not discounting actual addictions such as drugs and alcohol” (ok, glad he cleared that up), “when society calls everything an addiction, people are released from any personal responsibility they may have in the bad choices they make.” This is a very valid point. For example, an obese person can easily say, “I can’t help myself because I am addicted to food, it’s not my fault”, thereby justifying the choice to eat whatever he feels like eating.
He went on to say that failure to resist is a weakness. “Stop being weak, put down the donut”, he said. As someone who struggles to lose weight and who also loves donuts, I did not think this was very nice. But then again, nice is not a word one would use to describe this particular podcaster.
“’My grace is sufficient, my power is made perfect in weakness’…When I am weak, then I am strong” 2 Cor 12:9-10
This got me thinking about the relationship between weakness and strength. Saying simply “don’t be weak” is not enough. Rather, we need to build strength. How do we do that? When I think about weakness and strength, my mind automatically goes to muscles and weightlifting. Any weightlifter will tell you that you can’t just go from lifting a 15-pound weight to a 95-pound weight simply because you will yourself to “stop being weak.” Rather, every day you lift those 15 pounds. Then you increase the weight, gradually. All the while building your strength until you can lift that 95-pound weight.
The same can be said for the vices that this podcaster refers too. We must take accountability for these vices. But rather than just “stop” them, what if we did a different thing to regularly strengthen ourselves in virtue in order to eliminate them? Entering the retreat room, I pondered this thought as I looked at the table of goodies. What different thing could I do?
…at the retreat
Imagine my astonishment during our retreat when the priest began preaching about the power of repetition in building strength. As his words resonated with my earlier reflections, I couldn’t help but draw parallels to the world of weightlifting. In that realm, lifting weights is often referred to as “reps,” short for repetition, highlighting the fundamental principle of repeated actions leading to increased strength. Just like a weightlifter steadily adds more weight over time to grow stronger, we too can apply this concept to other areas of our lives. By consistently practicing and repeating positive behaviors, we gradually reinforce our strengths and overcome our weaknesses. Where else can we apply this?
Building Marriage by repetitive actions of being married
The priest then delved into the intricacies of marriage, illustrating how the love and bond between a husband and wife evolve and strengthen with each passing anniversary. He emphasized that while the initial “falling in love” feelings may fade, they are replaced by a deeper, more profound bond cultivated through the daily practices of actually being married.
Recently celebrating 30 years of marriage, I reflected on our journey. Every day we are together, we must participate in our relationship, regardless of how we are feeling about each other. Recalling how we got through the bad periods, I noticed something. Even though we might not be happy with one another during a particular time, we stay together doing the regular things. In other words, the repetitive practice of being married keeps us doing actions of a married couple. Eventually, that bad period passes and more often than not is forgotten. The regular and repetitive practice of being married has built our marriage, strengthened our love.
Building Faith by frequent practice of Mass
The priest then compared this to the regular and repetitive practice of our faith, specifically our relationship with the Eucharist. The more frequently we visit Christ in the Eucharist and receive Him at Mass in communion, the stronger our relationship with Him will be. The stronger our faith will be.
Thinking about my own relationship with Mass, I recall how I used to be so hard on myself for not attending daily mass. Other people did it. I had the time. I had the transportation. Why couldn’t I seem to make it happen? I see now that it is because of the sinful nature of humans. We seek the easy way many times, and if it is difficult, we make excuses rather than be accountable and work hard to get better. Much like the weightlifter, gradually adding weights, I finally started worrying less about attending Mass daily and focused on going one extra time weekly. When I had that down, I added another one.
It is not enough to simply stop being weak, but rather we must find a way to become strong. It wasn’t until I stopped expecting myself to do things perfectly and accept my weakness that I was able to recognize I needed God to help strengthen me, sort of like a trainer might help the weightlifter.
Now, I just need to let Him help me to work on eating less donuts.
